before it was a thing.

I always have felt that I could handle anything that came my way. I felt almost invisible, nothing could touch me; now that might be my adolescence or my inability to admit I cannot do everything but lately I feel very human. That sounds extremely odd, since that's exactly what we are; but I see everything in a different light. I think in moments like this you realize just what you love and what can fall by the wayside. You catch glimpses of what life really means. 

I know I'm lucky. I found this before it was ever a thing. 
There is something oddly da ja vu about this moment. 
I have been prepping for this for a while now. 
Putting my life into place so I could be able to handle this the way I wanted. 
To beat this
I know that I'm stronger. 
And I found it before it was anything. 

The haunt of what could've been makes me ill 
But I have a partner beside me that I couldn't have designed any better 

He makes me realize everyday that I am beyond lucky. 
Lucky to have him 
Lucky to have the career I have 
Lucky to have found this before 
Lucky to be now. 
He's my literal everything 

Life is brighter beside him. 
He makes me want to be better 
Make him proud 
He makes me, well, Me. 
He pushes me to think deeper. 
Think beyond my box of comfort. 
He understands I can do and will do better 

When I need to cry, he lets me 
When I need to laugh- he's already telling me a joke. 
If I doubt I can do this, he's standing right next to me holding me up 

I am lucky I found this before it was a thing. 
But this non thing made me realize I have everything. 

I am me. I got this.